I admit, I was a reluctant adopter of the whole social networking phenomenon. I was tardy in my adoption of Myspace (though quick to abandon it once people began pimping their 'space' out and it starting loading like dial up) and behind the times with Facebook (and admittedly only then because of the now defunct Scrabulous application). But, what I have found it to be, more than anything, is a weird meeting place for the forgetten members of our individual pasts as much as it is a way to stay connected with people in the present.
Memories are an odd thing. There are things you can't forget, and things you can only remember when prodded by a certain scent or a song and otherwise never cross your mind. My old friend Michelle, who is the impetus of this post, is like a song that defined a particular place and time in my life. In this case, freshman year of college.
Michelle was an acquantance in high school and little more. One of those people you could pick out of a lineup, but remain otherwise indistinct in our lives. As is the case with most people who leave for college and are away from home for the first time, the graduates of our high school that attended UF (perhaps a baker's dozen) found one another and clung together until we felt secure enough to venture out on our own. It is in this way that Michelle and I became close friends, skipping classes together and hanging out in my dorm room for the usual weekend drinking binges that occurred on my lightly patrolled dorm floor. Nothing ever happened between us, she was like a sister, but I have so many memories of us shuffling through used CDs at one or another of the many music stores near campus, attending numerous free concerts put on by the school, and late night cram study sessions. She is an indelible, and until recently, forgotten part of my college experience. She stands out all the more because, after freshman year, we drifted apart rather quickly. I began a serious relationship and closed my social circle and she joined a sorority that I, at the time, thought was quite ridiculous. So, just like that, the door opened and then abruptly closed A friendship with a distinct beginning and ending is a rare thing and leaves an indelible print the way romantic relationships often do.
On an utter and complete sidebar, thinking of her, I can't help but recall how insanely self-righteous I was at that time and place in my life.......and utterly hypocritical. I was militantly anti-smoking, but had a far more liberal policy about underage drinking (no stance whatsoever really). I thought religion was just a crutch for the weak minded and was willing to argue the point ad naseum (I still don't find any personal value in it, but understand that some people find it imensely important and I decline to concern myself with it as long as it does not infringe on my rights). I had never met an open homosexual and had a poor understanding that they were not some strange societal niche group, but rather part of every niche group and none at all. In other words, exactly like everyone in the greater majority save sexual preference. In short, I never was more certain (and likely egregiously wrongheaded) about the black and white nature of all things than I was in my late teens. I can't help but want to look back and laugh, though I know that much like the awkward physical growth spurts that define the earlier teen years, mental and emotional growth spurts are just part of life (only far more awkward in retrospect).
So, I am grateful to Facebook for this surprise trip down memory lane. I wonder who else will find me in the future and spark a similar journey. All i know is that I will look forward to it when it happens.
Happy Holidays to everyone.......remembered and (temporarily) forgotten.
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