1 down, 51 to go

I just wanted to take a few minutes to let everyone know that the emails havent stopped because I was maimed in some horrible accident nor have I lost all faculty for the English language (although recent testing has placed some doubt in my mind about my proficiency in that arena as well), it has just been a hellacious week 1 that saw me bounding between utter bewilderment and near comprehension. Had I not had the good fortunes of meeting a number of former students prior to starting, I would be far more concerned about things. Since I have had the fortune, I am confident in saying I am not alone.

Day 1: No sense dipping your toes in to test the water when you can put your most sensitive areas to the task all at once right? Well, so goes the philosophy that I must currently subscribe too. The day began with an orientation that introduced pretty much every member of the faculty and staff that either directly or indirectly will be a part of our journey. The students all introduced themselves as well. I was pleasantly surprised to see how diverse the group was. There are approximately 100 in our cohort (potentially slightly more) and in amongst the group there are people from Guam, S. Korea, Thailand, and S. Africa. There are about 10 other men as well. Clearly some in the group have extensive experience and others, such as myself, have virtually none. I did find out that I was fortunate to receive scholarship of any kind as many people got nothing at all in free aid.

After a brief intermission, we had our first 3 hour lecture on something that could have been Pathophysiology or could have been a dissertation on the finer points of macramé presented in Klingon because I understood little to none of it. It was akin to trying to pick up HBO by putting tinfoil on top of your TV set. In the words of Ron Burgundy as he jumped into the bear pit to save Veronica, "I immediately regret this decision." Thankfully I am not weak willed or smart enough to give up that easily.

Day 2: After the torrid pace of day 1, I settled in for the torrid pace of day 2, only drawn out slower and more painfully than this season of American Idol. We arrived at 8am and classes didnt conclude until nearly 7 that evening. In amongst them were some of genuine interest and nothing that is particularly noteworthy to remark upon that I can recall (I most vividly recall thinking of my brain as a shot glass that was teetering at the meniscus line and thinking that it could not be possible to process any more new information). I came home quite defeated and camped out in front of the tv determined not to think about it again until I awoke the next day.

Day 3: Finally some things started to make sense. The lectures started to sound less like expository in some foreign tongue and more like a garbled form of English (like pig latin filtered through a Burger King drive through microphone via a cup attached to a string). The process started to slow down..........some anyway. I finally felt, for the first time since I walked through the door on day one, that I can do this.

Day 4: My first lab, which was pretty nice although way too crowded. It seems a lot like playing make believe with your friends, only at some point they will make me do this to real people. Freaks me out. I cant think of anything else like it that I have done before. This was followed up for a luncheon that helped me feel that everyone was just about as freaked as I was. It is nice not to travel that road alone. Fake it til you make it. This led into 4 hours of testing that, quite frankly made me doubt not only my understanding of the lectures this week, but also of the English language and my ability to comprehend the written word. the testing was a kind of SAT for the nursing profession (although the connection between knowing when to use 'who' rather than 'whom' and learning how to care for a person with tachycardia mystifies me at the moment...........unless maybe someone were to ask you 'Is that the patient whom you are treating?'). The absurdity of giving the testing after you are in the program is not lost on me. Would now be the best time to find out the person setting up drip bags cant calculate how much medication should go in it? The idea is to help build on your weaknesses of course. Beyond the math which i feel very competent in, I hope I dont have too many other glaring ones because I will have enough on my plate trying to cram science into my head.

We finished the day at a review session that left me with the same look on my face that the Scooby Doo gang almost always had right after they unmasked another ghost that turned out to be the caretaker engaged in some elaborate scheme (that of course would have worked if it werent for 'those pesky kids.') After class I spoke with some other students who seemed really enlightened by the session while I felt as if someone sunk my battleship in five guesses. Suffice to say, I put my bookbag on the table when I got home and havent picked it up yet.

One thing that comes with age is the knowledge that this too shall pass. I bandy about terms like 'freaked out' but I truly havent been there as yet because I feel much more comfortable in taking the time to take a deep breath before I dive back in. Life is a marathon not a sprint and while this year may feel very quick, it is a long haul. I will save pulling out my hair until after the first test at least...........coming up this Wednesday.

Additionally to all this I have to give a big blog thank you to my girlfriend Tia who was wonderful and planned a beautiful and relaxing morning/afternoon for us both today. It was the kind of day that reminds me that school may reflect heavily in life, but life is not school.