done and done

Today I finished my last prerequisite course for UR. The dreaded micro biology. I performed very well on all the courses, but I wont kid myself, they aren't nearly as difficult as the terrestrial courses will be. Just the same though, it is nice to enter school on a positive note.

In other news, I thought I would post the few emails I have received from the University. I found the most humorous to be related to working. They have been adamant about the fact that you cannot work without outright stating it (which they would like to do, but they cannot mandate how you spend your leisure time and I doubt there is a one amongst us wouldnt wish to spend leisure time in industrious pursuits. Is it just me?). Evidently a lot of emails poured in from students fully intending to work and, well, you can read the response below. The humor was that UR defines 'being able to work' as 5 hours a week or less (best of luck finding that job) and then provides the 'circle of logic' which goes a like this: we aren't eligible for grants because we already hold Bachelor's degrees, a Bachelor's degree means you can work to support yourself so you dont require a grant, and you can't work because of the nature of the program therefore rendering the fact that you hold a degree moot. Funny, but not in a haha kind of way but rather the 'isnt it funny how it always rains the very day you decide to try your new paper mache outfit and not wear skivvies underneath (we have all been there)." It didnt affect me however as they have been clear throughout that working is strongly discouraged, and in cases such as these I find I am best served by not raging against the machine. In lieu of income, I have already arranged for some of my less utilitarian organs to be harvested to cover books and lab fees. Anyone need a kidney?

The emails follow, edited of only the parts that are totally irrelevant.

A few questions were e-mailed to me and I thought the answers might be useful to all of you-

1) What about housing? You should have received a packet about housing from Nancy Kita. Especially if you want to room with other APNN students - there are several small houses nearby that rent out every year to APNNs. Also, there is a helpful web link- http://ochousing.reslife.rochester.edu Make sure the area you choose (if you don't visit first) is not too far away - you have to get up early enough for clinicals!

2) When do I get my financial aid "package" ? The main university financial aid office reserves its grant money for first-degree seeking students (the philosophy being if you already have a degree you at least have the means to work and support yourself and go to school part time - and that is an option, although not helpful to the "accelerated" part of our program!)

The three ways people pay for this program-
a) working for our hospital but you must work there a year FT (or two years PT) BEFORE the benefit kicks in, in which case students generally do the program part time (since you need to continue working at least 17.5 hours per week to keep the benefit and it is NOT recommended that full time students work- this is for PT students), but the program is tuition free that way except for a few thousand dollars.

b) there are a few limited grants the School of Nursing has received (and so then of course we are free to distribute them, but these awards - Fuld and New York State Retraining - have been made. We did offer a few people who were not named Fuld Scholars, but otherwise had very strong applications - some general School of Nursing funds, but again this is limited)

Unrelated to our school, but a possible source of $ for people who are unemployed and living in Monroe County is www.rochesterworks.org They have given several of our students money toward tuition.

The monies mentioned in "b" here usually would not cover even half of the tuition, so most students will be using

c) LOANS and the full explanation of those (5-15K govt, the rest private) was sent to you with the financial aid "graph" illustrating that APNN students virtually all pay for this program with loans

(note that this year's tuition/fees are still "officially" posted - the university votes/updates in April - and costs typically rise a few % each year - next year straight tuition will likely be 15,600/semester for each of the three semesters; other fees include about 1K for labs/tech and ~600 for a mandatory health fee, and $90 for an activity fee)

So the bottom line is your "package" from the main university will only consist of loans. The Financial Aid office is now processing FAFSAs and will send letters soon. The only grant money would be those things in "b" above or individual grants you may have found/been offered (listings of other sources and web sites).

If you have questions before that (e.g. what banks are good for private loans, what financial aid forms have been received or you need a "guesstimate" of your loan amounts/sources), please contact the financial aid office directly at

Phone:(585)275-3226
Fax: (585)756-7664
E-mail: help@finaid.rochester.edu

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3) You really do need a computer since so much of our communication and course posting information are on websites. You will have online classes and every course is ofered through a platform called "Blackboard" - try out the "find it fast" link on our homne page for Blackboard and get an early start with the tutorials - you need to hit the ground running that first week, rather than be fiddling with your computer access.

As far as other things, we include the cost of the stethoscope in a lab fee, so you will get that. Uniforms, which you don’t wear until mid-July anyway, are white scrub tops and navy bottoms - here is an e-mail about that from one of your summer instructors-

To make it more streamlined and less hectic for students and staff & faculty we are going to have Scott at the medical center bookstore take care of ordering all the uniforms for students this year. Scott will arrange for try-ons and to pick up uniforms at the bookstore and take care of any order inquiries or concerns directly with the bookstore.

4) Parking - For those who have cars and don't live within walking distance, we will have time at orientation for you to go across the street to get parking passes (sticker for the window) for university lots (it's a little walk - about two short blocks - from the hospital). This year the cost was ~$20/month.

#2
I am very concerned about the few FULL TIME students who wrote that they intend to work (5 hours or per diem is not a problem, but some think they can work TWENTY HOURS - I am assuming you may not have seen the APNN schedule/calendar on the web site - check it out - you can have clinicals on Saturdays, so even working "weekends only" won’t always be possible)
As far as working, it is near impossible to get work hours in as a full time student - in the past, students have had to get these hours in on the weekend (that means a shift Saturday and Sunday) as there is no time during the week. For example, if you have clinical on a Thursday 7 am - 4 pm, you may need to go up to the hospital Wednesday evening and get the chart for your patient and go home and look up the disease, make drug cards for all the drugs, etc. In our very first group of APNN students, the ones who did not pass their boards on the first try were working too many hours (some as many as 20) and had no time to get the background reading done. The following years, we suggested students do the program PT if they want to or have to work and the improvement was dramatic. Of course, this is still your choice - we cannot legislate what folks do in their private time. I have just had several upset students in my office come the fall, saying "but I always worked full time in undergrad and grad school before!" Nursing is so time-consuming because of the hours - in college, 1 credit = 1 clock hour a week; in (any) nursing school, 1 clinical credit = 4 clock hours a week. Just something to think about...The full time program is not designed for concurrent work. Even the part time plan is unfortunately not a nice 50/50 split. It is much heavier in year 2. You would probably be able to work full time in year one (except for the first 8 weeks of summer), since it is only the straight didactic courses. Look at the part time plan so you can cross-check against the calendar and see how year 2 is very full (because we didn't want to "unbundle" the clinicals). You will then see how much class time will be needed. So for year two, you would need to cut down your employment and get your hours in on the weekends. Sorry the program isn't really "family-friendly" - it is more of an "immersion" experience!

More to come when more information comes. Still waiting for FA.

Q: When is $15K not $15K? A: When school cost $60K.

I never thought a $15K scholarship would be a mixed blessing. I thought I would find it to be overwhelmingly satisfactory actually. It most situations it would be spectacular. I can scarcely imagine any other situation in my life where walking into $15K would not be so overwhelmingly significant that i wouldnt tell that story into perpetuity while, of course, exagerrating my physique and acts of bravery which led to acquiring such a sum. My finances are such that finding a $10 bill in a jacket pocket qualifies as a good day regardless of other events.

It certainly isnt insignificant, and I would (and may) sound jaded by inferring that it is, but it pales in comparison to the cost of school. What it means is about 25%. That is the wonderful news! I would be pleased were my car or student loans 25% paid off. It also means that 75% is still in doubt, awaiting word on who will loan it to me. That is far from wonderful. Its a mixed blessing because had it been more (say 30K) I would have not thought twice about diving into the remaining debt as ludicrous as as taking out 30K sounds. Had it been 5K, I would have had to find another path to school. Reminds me of every raise I have ever received at any job I have had, it is never enough to truly make you feel appreciated or happy, but never so little as you dont accept it. Plus, I cannot shake the notion that the scholarships are just there to make the total cost appear more palatable while maintaining the veneer that you are going to a more expensive school. Much like you wouldn't find Target prices at Macy's...but you might find Macy's stuff on sale for Target prices. There is something about finding that $50 shirt on sale for 50% off vs just going out and buying a $25 shirt. Though, in the end, they both cost the identical amount.

I also just found out that two other students did not get the general academic scholarship that I got, but did get the Fuld scholarship, one person for 15K, the other for 20K. Reinforcing my belief that everyone gets something, because it makes it more palatable. I find this news both unsettling, because I did not get the Fuld but am placated by the fact that whether I got it or not, it would ultimately not mean a great difference to my bottom line. Evidently there are no double coupons and Fuld or no Fuld, we will all be neck deep in debt.

Clarity from a hygienist

Clarity about your career and how it impacts your life comes in drips and drabs. For some, it seems like they are born with an innate understanding of who they are and how they hope to parlay that into a career. Be it an artist, chef, or secretary, these are the people that continue to stupify me. I look upon them with the same queer curiosity one might examine a baboon at the zoo with. It is a familiar creature, but also a hopelessly foreign one.

Every once in awhile you run into someone that you can relate to and truly see 'it', the answer to the great mystery. This answer came in an odd package. My hygienist was a male with two small gold hoop earrings in one ear and none in the other, as if to counterbalance some minor weight disparity betwixt the two sides of his head. He was older. Age i could not guess, but too old for small gold hoop earrings. He stomach a large protrusion that loudly proclaimed a love of all things fermented of barley and hops. His face was unknowable, hidden as it was throughout by a surgical mask. So, how was this person so revelatory you may inquire? Well, despite doing something that i imagine to be repetitive, droll, and rather unpleasant (which my career choice may be to some.....as all career choices are to some actually), he was positively enamored with his vocation. He admonished me for my flossing habits (or lack thereof truly) but not in a flip manner that suggests the words were perfunctory in nature, but rather in an informed and concerned manner. He proceeded to rattle off all sorts of information while going about his task and did so happily. He did so in manner so transparent that I was compelled to compliment him about it and he told me he loved his job in a way that I would only describe a good book or film. It was at that moment that the bolts locked into their cylinders and I knew that that was what I wanted from a profession.....well, sans earrings. I want a career that I feel that way about.

I know he has to have bad days and good ones and, quite possibly, I just caught him on a good one. But I cant remember ever feeling the way he seems to about his job. I have had, and do have, some wonderful co-workers and have had the opportunity to do some enjoyable things at work, but I have not ever felt enamored of a job. Maybe nursing wont be that way for me, but I am willing to bet up to $50K that it is.

Is that a finger up my ass, or are you just happy to see me?

It amazes me the things we acclimate ourselves to as we grown older. From the relative freedoms of the less than 30 hour work week in elementary school to the rather arduous one in high school, before it scales back in college to a point in which you become so immersed in those freedoms that you don’t look both ways when crossing the street and amble out in front of the soul crushing 100 ton cement trunk of adult work life, doomed to spend the best part of every day doing things you would rather not or, at the very least, rather not every day for 8 hours or more.

I think about this as I near 30 and begin to consider my own future. It became alarmingly real as I bent over the examination table with the doctor’s heavily lubricated finger up my ass (part of a physical, not just for shits and giggles)…….I am really going to do this. Full-time or part-time, partially funded or selling any body part I have a duplicate of, it is happening. I will always be part of the machine, but I am finally starting to pick which part.

Throughout it I doubt there will be much time that I wont be terrified, doubt my abilities, or under stress, but hopefully that will lessen and not exponentially increase. Lets hope anyway.

As an addendum to this: Do you think when my doctor dreamed of going to medical school and worked hard to pull himself through it both financially and academically he thought at any moment in that time that he would spend part of any given day with his fingers in other people's orifices? I am guessing no.